Easter Vigil

Last night I got literally everything out of a church service I could ever hope to receive. I think this mass more or less marked the end of my church-hopping ways. I have finally found a spiritual home.

My priest spoke about opening our doors, and how blessed and loved each of us are. It sounds simple enough, but I don't usually get exactly what I am looking for in a service, but he hit the nail on the head. A lot of us see our weaknesses, individual and communal, and start to doubt our futures, mortal and otherwise. But I left church feeling more uplifted and hopeful than I have been in as long as I can remember.

Here are some snippets from his sermon, pasted together as best as I can recall, though undoubtedly lacking the eloquence and fire with which Father Tony delivered them.

Back in 19XX (don't recall year) Pope John-Paul II was giving a televised sermon, and his message was to open the doors of ourselves and of the Church. And as John-Paul shuffled over to the doors, as he could barely move at the time, he went to push them open and struggled against them. There was a Bishop on the other side of the door who was going to pull it open for the Pope, kinda of making it look like the door finished opening alone. But the camera was a little too slow, and we saw the bishop helping open the door.

And this was perfect, because we can't open the doors alone. And God will help you the second you begin. What more could give you to convince you that you're worthy? He gave up his Son to save you. Who are you to doubt that you are loved? Who are you to doubt that you are saved? God gave his Son to the most painful death possible for your redemption! He let He Himself made flesh die for you! Who are you to doubt Him and what He did? There is literally nothing you could do to make you unworthy. Just open your doors and accept him.

"But I'm liberal, I'm conservative, I doubt." Open the doors.
"But I'm on drugs, I'm gay, I'm an immigrant." Open the doors!
"I'm weak, I'm a sinner, a criminal." OPEN THE DOORS

I don't know what else God could possibly do to convince you that you're worthy. If you asked someone to sacrifice themselves for you, and they did it, how can you doubt? What more can He do?

I know I butchered that bad boy pretty horrifically, but hopefully you get the gist. It was nice to see something so, well, hopeful. I can be a bit of a cynic, and it was nice to get a wake-up call like that.

Unconditional Love

It's quite a concept. To love with absolutely no reservations or limitations. I am not sure humans are capable of it. I don't have kids yet, so I know I am missing some key information, but I'm just not sure it is possible for our species. I love my wife, but there are things either of us can do that would more or less force the other to terminate the marriage. God willing neither of us ever will ever do any them, and I don't believe we will, but these actions are conceivable from a scientific what-is-possible perspective.

I don't think that qualifies as unconditional love. I truly love her, as she does me, but their are conditions to our relationship. Such is not the case with our dog.

My dog unconditionally loves my wife. He loves me, and I love him, but he will just gaze into my Beloved's eyes for literally hours. He falls asleep as near to her as he can possibly get. He loves to collapse with his head on her shredded, dancers feet at every opportunity. She adores him, and loves him as much as one can love a non-human, but even if she didn't, I think he would live for her. She could abuse him in the most horrible ways imaginable, but I think he would keep coming back to her. There is simply no end to his love for my wife.

Given my jaded perspective of human nature, it gives me hope to see that kind of love. Hope for us as a whole. As if the mere fact that love like that can exist means that maybe, just maybe, we can make it in this cutthroat world without literally cutting each others throats. I'm usually pretty realistic, but it nice to know there are some things that are absolutely perfect, literally without flaw. Such is that kind of love. I'm glad it is possible.